top of page

Is It Possible to Be Completely Restored After Trust is Broken?


"Just like [this] glass, once it's been destroyed, it will never be the same."

What were your immediate thoughts after reading this quote? Did you think of a person who may have done something to lose someone else's trust, leaving the relationship forever changed and likely destroyed? Did it take your mind to a personal memory where someone hurt you by doing or saying something that left your relationship strained?

When I first saw it, it raised so many thoughts in my head, including revisiting any past ways that my trust has been broken when I had already done the work to heal, forgive, and restore (yes, I had done the work because healing is MY responsibility first.)

Yes, it is true that things will never be the same after trust is broken. Here's a bit of a different perspective and possibly a teachable moment on this, because it doesn't have to be a bad thing.

1. Quotes and images like this tend to have a negative connotation. They cause us to rehash old feelings that we may have already put in the work to heal from. We have to be mindful of the energy we're putting out there so as not to spread negativity, even if our intentions are pure. We also have to be mindful of going along with every quote we see that triggers and agrees with our current but ever-changing emotions, and remember these quotes were created by someone else's triggered emotions that may or may not have been dealt with or checked. Guard your heart, protecting it from all negative energy, and resist the urge to make decisions based off your feelings. Rule of thumb I try to go by: if I can't back the "advice" up with scripture, then it is not the truth and I don't have to go along with it.

"Guard your heart above all else, for it determines the outcome of your life." -Proverbs 4:23

2. When is ANYTHING ever the same as it once was, and when did that become a bad thing? The only thing constant is change. Better yet, the only One Who never changes is God. Our change is expected.

"I am the Lord, and I do not change..." -Malachi 3:6

3. This really is a nice analogy; it makes perfect sense on the surface: break a glass (aka trust), and that glass will forever have scars and never be the same. While this is true, we have to remember this: we are not glass! We are human beings, and our relationships and we ourselves can be completely healed and made better than new if we DO THE WORK! Of course things won't be the same, but maybe the real issue is that we want the comfort of things being the same. When we are broken, it gives God the opportunity to do some REAL WORK in our lives and change us for the better. That's where He does His biggest miracles! That is when the very things that are exposed are used to restore you to something greater than what you were operating out of.

"He heals the brokenhearted and bandages their wounds." -Psalms 147:3

4. With a little time, attention, love, care, and changed behavior, things can be made right again even after trust has been broken. Whoever you once were might not ever be the same, but the you that you become after being broken down will restore you to something much better than before. And again, keep in mind this will require WORK. It won't happen overnight, and it won't happen just because you will it to. Some moments may be more difficult than others, but that is where real faith takes place.

"The Lord says, I will give you back what you lost..." -Joel 2:25

5. Maybe God never intended for you or your relationship to remain the same...

"Therefore, change your hearts and stop being stubborn." -Deuteronomy 10:16

My hope is that we all learn to look at man-made quotes and ideas like this from a more optimistic point of view. The idea that something would remain "broken" forever isn't healthy nor is it true because God is a God of healing, hope, and restoration, and not a single situation or circumstance is exempt.

"...but beautiful mosaics are made of broken pieces."
-Lori Jenessa Nelson

It really bothers me to see so many hurt people and broken relationships not knowing how to get out of that terrible space of pain and resentment. If you're wondering how to bounce back from broken trust, try this:

If you're the offender, be committed and willing to change the offensive behavior that caused the rift in the relationship. It is your responsibility to initiate reconciliation.

"So when you are offering your gift at the alter, if you remember that your brother or sister has something against you, leave your gift there before the alter and go; first be reconciled to your brother or sister, and then come and offer your gift." -Matthew 5:23-24

If you're the offended, be prepared and willing to fully forgive the person who hurt you. Forgiveness is not an option if you want to be forgiven for your own sins.

"If you forgive those who sin against you, your heavenly Father will forgive you." Matthew 6:14

Both will require accountability, grace, patience, perseverance, self-reflection, and work, as well as the desire to repair and reconcile the broken relationship. Both will need to remember that they could always be on the opposite side of the coin, needing to forgive or needing to be forgiven. Most importantly, it will require God's help. He knows how fickle our emotions can be, and He knows how difficult restoring something that has been broken can be. Trust Him.

"For I can do everything through Christ, who gives me strength."
-Phillippians 4:13

If you are in a place where this quote resonated with you or touched a nerve, and you're unsure of how to change your situation, be encouraged, and stay in prayer. Great things can happen with you and your loved ones if you have faith and believe it will.

Happy Healing...


48 views1 comment

Recent Posts

See All

1 Comment

Dec 09, 2020

Hi Samantha...hope all is well. I enjoy your writing and hope you share again soon! Chanta Howard

bottom of page